The Art of Spinning the Block: When Is It Worth Revisiting an Ex?

Relationships aren’t always straight roads. Sometimes, they’re more like roundabouts—confusing, frustrating, and full of missed exits. Eventually, you might find yourself asking, “Should I turn around and take another lap with my ex?” That’s what we call “spinning the block.” It sounds fun—and maybe a little dramatic—but let’s be real: spinning the block is not something to do lightly.

So how do you know when it’s worth it to revisit a relationship? Let’s talk about it, spin some truth, and give you the tools to make this decision—because ain't nobody got time for spinning in circles with the same mess.

What Is ‘Spinning the Block’?

In case you’re not up on the lingo, “spinning the block” is all about giving a past relationship another shot. Maybe life—or poor decision-making—pushed you apart, and now you’re wondering, “What if?” Maybe it’s been a couple of years, or maybe you ran into them at the grocery store, and now your heart is doing the absolute most. It happens. But before you pull a U-turn on love, there are some things you need to think about.

Personal Tales from the Block

When Timing Was on Our Side

On the Main Event Mamas podcast, Tanesha shared her story about spinning the block with her high school boyfriend. Fast forward to years later, and as grown adults, they somehow crossed paths again. But let’s be clear—this was not an overnight thing. They took their time and moved like grown folks, not lovesick teenagers. “For a whole year, we acted like this wasn’t happening,” she said. But the difference this time? They had both grown. It wasn’t “let’s pick up where we left off.” This was a fresh start with new, mature energy.

And because let’s not forget, Tanesha made one thing clear at the beginning: “Just so you know, you ain’t about to hit this.” (Spoiler alert: years later, they’re still going strong.)

When to Leave the Block for Good

But spinning the block isn’t always a cute reconnection story. Tanesha also shared about spinning the block on her ex-husband—multiple times. What happened? Same old issues, same outcomes. The love was gone, the accountability wasn’t there, and the cycle just wasn’t worth repeating.

So if you're stuck spinning a block that leads nowhere, exit. As Tanesha said, “If you see me spinning the block with that one again, y’all better grab me and steer me the other way.”

How to Know If Spinning the Block Is Worth It

There’s a fine line between giving love a second chance and wasting your time. Here’s how to figure out which road you’re on:

1. Have You Grown?

Let’s say this loud for the people in the back: Time doesn’t magically fix relationship problems. Growth does. The person you were then isn’t the person you (hopefully) are now. The same applies to your ex. If neither of you has put in the work, there’s no reason to think the relationship will suddenly thrive.

💡 Key Insight: “When we came back, we were grown,” Tanesha said about her successful spin. Growth isn’t just about saying, “I’ve changed.” It shows in how you handle conflict, communicate, and set boundaries.

2. Was the Split Situational or Fundamental?

Some relationships don’t work the first time because of timing, distance, or other external factors. Those are situational issues. What’s harder to fix? Fundamentals like clashing values, disrespect, or toxic patterns.

💡 Ask Yourself:

• Was the breakup caused by circumstances or deeper incompatibilities?
• Do you feel safe, valued, and loved by this person?
• Are you stepping back into the same issues—or creating new solutions?

3. Is There Accountability?

If neither of you is willing to own up to what went wrong, spinning the block is going to lead straight to disappointment. Accountability is the foundation of any second chance. If they’re still deflecting and blaming their ex (aka, you), it’s not worth the trip.

💡 Pro Tip: Accountability works both ways. Look in the mirror and ask yourself if you’ve taken responsibility for your part in why things didn’t work out.

4. Don’t Confuse Nostalgia with Progress

Sometimes we want to spin the block because we miss who we thought the person was, not who they actually are. Nostalgia will have you romanticizing date nights while forgetting the night you cried yourself to sleep. Be honest with yourself about how this relationship made you feel.

💡 Main Event Mamas’ Wisdom: As Kiara said, “The person you spin the block on needs to fit into the future you, not the past you.”

5. Have That Real Conversation

Let’s be honest, spinning the block might start with, “I miss you,” but it needs to lead to tough conversations about what went wrong and how to fix things. If you’re not asking the hard questions—"Why did this fail?" "What changes have you made?"—you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.

💡 Truth Bomb: Communication can rebuild a bridge or prove why it needed to burn in the first place. If they aren’t willing to talk openly and honestly, skip it.

When to Keep on Driving

Look spending the block isn’t always a good idea. If there’s been infidelity, abuse, betrayal, or toxicity, keep driving. Do not pass go. Do not collect heartbreak. Take the lessons, thank the universe for teaching you what you don’t deserve, and don’t look back.

So, When Is It Worth It?

Here’s the deal: Spinning the block only works when there’s genuine growth on both sides. You’re not looking for a replay—you’re looking for a sequel that’s bigger, better, and more aligned with who you are now.

As Tanesha said, "It takes work. Real talk it’s going to take both of you growing up, showing up, and working for what you want. Love isn’t enough on its own."

Final Thoughts

Spinning the block can lead to a second shot at happiness—or have you stuck in the same old drama. The magic lies in knowing your own worth, setting boundaries, and making sure you're stepping into something better than what you left behind.

So, before you make the turn: Ask yourself, Is this road leading me forward—or pulling me back?

What’s your take on spinning the block? Have you ever done it? Was it worth it—or did you regret it? Let us know in the comments, and let’s keep it real!

P.S. If nothing else, just remember the golden rule: Don’t spin the block on the same mess you cried about the first time.