Bloodlines, Bad Wifi, and Botched Remixes: The Road to WrestleMania Gets Rocky

Tonight’s Monday Night Raw felt like a fever dream in the best way possible. From the heavy hitters in the opening segment to the psychological warfare in the main event, the "new era" writing is definitely making its mark.

The Vision Civil War

The show opened with Seth Rollins surrounded by a sea of masked men, but it quickly turned into a massacre. Brock Lesnar returned and started suplexing the black hoods off everyone in sight, only for the Ruler Oba Femi to emerge and lay out the Beast with a Fall From Grace. This I am here for, period. I love the way Oba hasn't lost a step since leaving his NXT title in the ring. He like Trick is shining brightly and that better continue.

The Gaslight King Returns

Roman Reigns made an early appearance to remind everyone why he’s the sun that the WWE universe orbits around. He’s back to his old tricks, praising the Usos for attacking CM Punk while simultaneously guilt-tripping them. The highlight? Roman looking directly into the lens to recruit more family members for a WrestleMania-sized hit on Punk. He’s playing chess while everyone else is playing checkers. =

WrestleMania Stakes for the Women

We saw AJ Lee take on Bayley in a match that left me wanting so much more. After Bayley’s incredible performance in AAA this past weekend, it’s clear she deserves to be carrying the division. However, the night ended painfully for AJ after a "stiff" attack from Becky Lynch.

Speaking of the women’s division, we have a major musical emergency. Stephanie Vaquer made a statement by taking out Raquel Rodriguez, but the new remix of her theme song is a total miss. Let the woman keep her original music! In other news, it looks like Bayley and Lyra Valkyria might be heading toward a WrestleMania tag team run. 

The Puppet Master Reveals Her Hand

In a chilling backstage vignette, Liv Morgan finally admitted what we all suspected: she was the one who orchestrated Finn Bálor’s expulsion from The Judgment Day. Shout out to Tanesha here who's been screaming this from the rooftops.  She claimed she’s been the puppet master all along and that she’s going to make JD McDonagh a star now that Finn is out of the way. Do I think we still need a Judgment Day though? Nope it's time for a rebrand Liv and company or just let everyone go their separate ways.

High-Flying Excellence & Lucha Libre Chaos

In the battle of the El Grande Americanos, things got campy. The "Imposter" stole the win after his partner, Bravo, slipped a metal plate into his mask. When the "Original" (Chad Gable) went for a diving headbutt, he essentially knocked himself out. 

Dragon Lee vs. Penta was an absolute masterclass in athleticism. Seeing Dragon Lee chat with JaVon Evans afterward was a great touch of respect, and the surprise appearance by Danhausen added that perfect pinch of "very nice, very evil" chaos that only he can provide. Plus somebody get Grayson Waller a long distance hug because clearly he's going to need it.

Sidebar: how long does a curse last? Dominic won he Triple AAA match this weekend so did the curse wear off? But I guess since he's not medically cleared, does that mean it's still in effect?

Meanwhile, the tension in the tag division is simmering as Asuka continues her relentless psychological (and physical) abuse of Kairi Sane. We must be headed towards a big tag team showcase that better be on one or the Mania nights and not Smackdown.

The Viper’s Secret Call

The most bizarre segment of the night involved Randy Orton and some truly terrible cell service. Randy was seen on the phone discussing being a "killer" and mentioning that "wrestling has more than one royal family." Is the Viper looking to align with the Ring General, Gunther? His father? Whoever was on the other end of that line has clearly awoken the Apex Predator and admittedly I'm here for it.

More Trouble in Vision World?

We also saw a curious moment when Austin Theory checked on poor Maxxine Dupri after her loss to Nattie. Logan Paul looked absolutely disgusted by the gesture. Is there a crack forming in what's left of the Vision, or is Logan just allergic to empathy?

The "Phil" Problem

The night concluded with a war of words between Roman Reigns and "Phil" (CM Punk). Roman was in rare form, dropping "marching orders" and reminding Punk that he hasn't even main-evented a live event in Europe, let alone a WrestleMania without him. Punk admitted he deserved the heat based on his previous comments but double down on him being someone who says what he wants. He says he’s already inside Roman’s head but the one who snapped at the end of the night was Mr. Punk himself. When Roman called him "old," Punk finally threw hands.

An interesting note though. Is that the crowd, however, seemed firmly planted on the Island of Relevancy as they continuing calling for Roman throughout the entire segment. Why might you ask? Make sure you check out my explanation about Roman being the center of the universe. 

As the cameras faded to black in San Antonio, one thing was crystal clear: the psychological warfare has officially moved from the ring to the rafters. Whether it’s Roman Reigns manipulating his bloodline, Liv Morgan pulling the strings of The Judgment Day, or Randy Orton taking mysterious calls in the dark, everyone is playing a dangerous game of 'Who can I trust?

Stay tuned for this week's episodes

Plus, you do NOT want to miss this week’s fun! We’ve got our All-Women’s Wrestling Panel coming at you during this week’s Midnight Confessions. We’re diving deep into the Bayley/AJ/Becky triangle, and believe me, some feelings will be hurt. And don't forget we're giving you our review of AEW's Revolution and I promise we have more to say than... it was bloody?!